farters have to be the big spoon...
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
