nut hugger
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize