He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
pray to the hookup gods
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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