We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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