Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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