never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I supernannyed him into submission
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
