I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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