there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
