don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
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