Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize