I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I lost the right to judge tonight
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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