Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
