This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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