Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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