So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
