Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize