i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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