if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
