what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
