we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
it's like iHOP with fire
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I will be naked everywhere
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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