I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Randomize
