Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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