wrigley field is MILF paradise
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize