the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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