Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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