We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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