This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize
