I think my vagina is haunted
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
