Buhtt sex?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
