Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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