My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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