We're like a lot better than the average bears
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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