will power is for people who don't want to get laid
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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