they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
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