She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?