butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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