She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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