i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
