I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize