gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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