He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
porn star boner night. come get it.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
