Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
