where does the pee come out of this thing
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
