i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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