if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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