The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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