when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
