Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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