Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Randomize
