i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize
