Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
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