But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
